I did take Arianna in to see the orthopedic doctor on Tuesday. After he looked at her foot, ankle, and spine he felt confident that this (ankle pronation) is nothing to be concerned with "right now". I am completely fine with that news. I still need to go get her some better supportive shoes but I just LOVE her little Nike's so I haven't done that yet.

We had her speech therapy after our appointment and the first thing the ST asked what how often Arianna is allowed to use her paci. I told her all day long. She asked if there was any way to just limit that to bed time. To be honest with you I am ready to ditch the paci myself so that was all the motivation I needed. She said because of her speech delays the paci is really not going to help with her speech. So.....yesterday I didn't give her the paci ALL DAY and man was that a LONG day. She cried and cried but I didn't give in. Then this morning I let her have it while we laid in bed watching cartoons but as soon as it was time to leave the room I took it away from her. She cried for a second but that was about it. She did ask for it today but not as much. I just kept distracting her by playing with playdo (which is a new word she can say!) When it got closer to bed time she started getting fussy and I was walking to get her paci when I realized she had already fallen asleep in my arms. So looks like she doesn't need it to fall asleep so we might actually be completely done with the paci. That would be great! But we'll just see how she does the second we get in the car cause she always gets her paci in the car.

I do have to say after just two days without the paci she is eating better, saying more words and babbling more, and even sleeping better. You think there is a connection? I do!

So the past few days Arianna has become such a dare devil. She is trying to climb on everything, including the top of the couch. Here is what she discovered she could do last night.

Such determination in her eyes..

I haven't taken a bath picture in awhile so here one is...

You can barely even see her scar!

This afternoon my heart momma friend came over again and this time Arianna LOVED playing with the baby. "Baby" is one of her new words so she kept saying it all day. I have to tell you how nice it is to be able to hang out with another heart mom. She has been such a help with me over the past few weeks with the support group that I asked her to be my Co-Coordinator and she said YES!!! She is also putting together our website for our group and it seems to be coming together rather nicely.

Check out Arianna eye balling baby Kira's paci...

Let me have that...

Girls just hanging out watching "Yo Gabba Gabba"

Hey Isaac, what to come over and watch it with us?

I have started letting Arianna pull a chair up to the kitchen counter and help me with whatever I'm doing at the moment. She loves helping wash her cups....it's more like splashing water all of the place but she loves it. I also let her help me cook or bake...of course nothing that can hurt her. She normally does the mixing and pouring. So today I was in the kitchen and heard her drag the chair over to the counter. I turned around and she had climbed onto the chair by herself and was standing on it in the middle of the kitchen! I was so excited because I've been waiting for the day that she could get on a chair like that by herself but kind of freaked out after wards. So I pull the chair up to the counter and she starts climbing onto the chair again but this time slips and falls, but thanks to my cat like reflexes since becoming a mom I grabbed her by her arm before she hit the ground. Phew!!! I have to watch out with her now that she is climbing on everything. I've waited a long time to finally say that. :)

So here she is helping me with dinner tonight...

So now that all the nice and happy stuff is out I just have to tell you how saddened I am to hear that sweat heart buddy Colin has earned his angel wings this week. My heart just breaks when I hear of a child leaving this earth too soon. He has been loved by so many and will always be in my heart.

So I've had a very emotional week after watching a heart baby die in the hospital and finding out about Colin. It just breaks my heart that so many children have to endure so much and then loss this fight against CHD's. I am scared more today about Arianna than I have been in awhile. I have known soo many heart kids that are doing fine then all of a sudden their hearts just stop. And after the incident the other morning thinking Arianna wasn't breathing....I just feel like this is such a burden to carry every day. I have been waking up every morning since Friday just crying because I am so blessed to have another day with my daughter. I am so scared that one day I will wake up and she will not be with us. My whole world has changed since we found out about Arianna's heart and there are days that I'm happy we did and there are days that I wish I could just turn the hands of time around and never start on this road. I know am a better person today than I have ever been in my life and I owe that all to my daughter. I'm helping many families through our support group and I feel like I have a direction in life now. I may not be a scientist, a lawyer, or a doctor, I'm just a heart mom that is trying to make a difference in my local heart community.

Sorry for such a sad ending to such a wonderful post but I always feel better after posting these things on here. I just have to learn to deal with all these emotions and fears. I still find myself just trying to take it one day at a time.

I think it's time for a vacation.....maybe one day right?!?! I'm still thinking the heart mom vacation would be an awesome idea. Maybe Vegas since Kathy is already there! :)