Today Arianna put on a
tank top that really showed off her scar. She was standing in the mirror
looking at her chest and asked, "Mama, what are these bumps?" I've told
her many times before but I know as she gets older she will ask and I
just remind her. I told her, "Those are the wires holding your sternum
together." She asked, "How did they do that?" This is the question I've
been dreading since her surgery. I had a feeling it was coming since she
is maturing so fast. Without even thinking I said, "Well they had to cut open your chest..." I have NEVER said the word "cut"
before because I know that would be scary but it just slipped out. I
normally just say open and she is okay with that. Her poor eyes got as
wide as golf balls and she interrupted me. "THEY CUT ME OPEN?!?!"
she said as she stared into my eyes. All I could say was "Yes baby they
did." She then asked, "How did they do that?" Another question I've
dreaded for 5 years. Instead of giving her the great details I was
hoping I could just say "They used tools." and see if that was enough
for her at this time. Thank God it was. I then proceeded to explain how
the sternal wires were placed. "You see they had to get to your heart
which is deep inside your chest so they had to get past your sternum and
ribs. Then when they fixed your heart they pulled your ribs back
together and used the wires to keep your bones from moving." She just
looked at me. I told her as I placed my hands upon her chest and traced
her scar with my finger "You see baby, that is why you are so brave and
strong. You went through something so big and scary and overcame it!"
She then flexed her muscles and said, "I AM strong! Look at my muscles!"
I just LOVE her!
I'm sure this is the first of many conversations we will have about her heart and all she has been through. From the very beginning Robert and myself have decided we would be honest and never lie to her about what she has been through. There are certain ways to say things at different ages. I know that God will continue to guide us through life and how we raise Arianna. He is always present and knows exactly what she needs to know and when she needs to know it in order to cope with her chronic medical condition.
I'm sure this is the first of many conversations we will have about her heart and all she has been through. From the very beginning Robert and myself have decided we would be honest and never lie to her about what she has been through. There are certain ways to say things at different ages. I know that God will continue to guide us through life and how we raise Arianna. He is always present and knows exactly what she needs to know and when she needs to know it in order to cope with her chronic medical condition.
